A brightly lit day, and, oh, what is that? Is that someone's white arse bending over? What are they - Oh my!
Yep, I know someone who had to drop an emergency deuce in an alleyway because there were no other options. (That takes major balls IMO - kudos).
I'd heard from a lot of pregnant women or those with children who talk about having to use the washroom. Immediately. But I hadn't had the fortune of experiencing that magical moment myself.
Today, was my day.
I was out for a 5.5km run, which turned into a 3.5km run 2km walk, and I was maybe 10 minutes from being back at the office when it hit.
Thank goodness it wasn't the urge to crap myself. I just had to pee something fierce.
The unfortunate part of this is that the path I was running on is sandwiched between the ocean and apartment/condo buildings. There is nowhere for me to go.
So, what did I do? I'm sure you're asking...Well, first, like an idiot, I thought I could hold it. And if you're wondering, yes, I did resort to even doing the pants pull to try and help.
You know, where you pull the crotch of your pants up. Just a step above the four-year-old method of putting my hand right in my crotch.
And nothing spells I gotta pee, quite like a crotch grab of some sort.
Yeah, that made it worse.
So finally I saw a bush and made a beeline. In the bush I actually found a path so I quickly ripped my maternity support belt up (it wasn't helping my bladder any) and dropped trou. Man did it feel good.
Anyways, long story short, I thought that perhaps the ladies behind me had missed my get away because I had just turned a corner when I headed to the bushes.
But no. As I was heading back to the path and fixing my support belt the ladies were right there. One even stopped to let me go ahead.
The only thing that would have made this worse, would have been if I'd run off with toilet paper stuck to the bottom of my shoe.